a sense of subversion? Against anyone? A parent, sibling? A partner? Even a friend — strange as that seems. An underlying current of rebellion or angst? That was my thought as I dried my chai-making utensils.

strange, indeed

Does that mean that a lot of other sentiments stem from that? Wrote sentiments instead of feelings because I am endeavoring to stay away from the word. Feelings stem from thoughts, whereas I don’t think sentiments do.

sub· vert səb-ˈvərt 

to overturn or overthrow from the foundation: ruin

to pervert or corrupt by an undermining of morals, allegiance …

O

bvi the 1^st def is more of what I mean. Checking another dictionary besides Merriam-Webster. I used to always check others whenever I wanted a 2nd opinion, but realized my affinity is toward M-W.

Okay, subversion was not the correct word. It is more akin to turning something or someone upside down (boy, would I love to do that =). What I meant, whether I like it or not, is much more common and I already wrote it in the first sentence: to rebel, in the vein of

being defiant w/out defying