from Course In Miracles
months ago
and wrote it this morning on the cover of a new notebook — I jot down thoughts, ramblings, and quotes that move me during my morning | spiritual reading time.
But it still resonates in my heart. Makes me stop for a couple of seconds when I come upon it (it’s a tad long to be a tattoo =) so I can take it in, imbibe it — almost savoring it. Then I move on. But today, it drew me to grab pen + paper before any reading.
calm mind suffer agony doubt
— made a Freudian slip: I started to write fear* instead of the word doubt. Which is perhaps the reason why I am penning this. See: in general terms, I think fear + pride are intermingled and the cause of all that is not good, pure, wholesome: life. But that sentence has planted a seed of (you got it) doubt.
What’s rattling my brain is that if doubt plays a part in the pride | fear equation, the whole thing makes no sense. Which is the whole point. Stay w/ me, I may figure this out and create a lovely circle.
i wrestle at fear — shy at pride
see doubt as silly
Yet, maybe from doubt sprout fear and pride? That blows my thoughts to pieces. Fear + pride are of the ego. Is doubt its lie? Confounding but interesting and worth delving into because it loosens a knot, shining a light on something vague + ethereal + lovely.
the closer i get to the
truth, the less fear and doubt, yet more aware am I of something or somewhere I am unable to explain — a place or state of calm and delicious nothingness (strange as that may sound). It’s bliss.
