i have this

teeny, little book

that I rediscover now and again. The dedication on the first page shows I gave it to a friend in 2006. It is among my morning books right now, and I pick it up whenever — not daily. It contains thirty “encounters” (or kernels), one for each day of a month. I want to savor it, make it last, so I do not read it every day. There’s a seed right here, isn’t there? If it could be of benefit, I should read it every day for one month. But I don’t. Could digress. The pages are full of collages, so aesthetically it is also gold. Each reading encompasses 2 pages, a spread. The artwork on both, the words on one.

so this morning i pick it up first

And re-read the two pages I read last, titled: Strength, and Diamonds. Then I flipped to the front page and read the dedication I wrote, which consists of excerpts from another book. I wrote the dedication sideways with gold ink on the first three blank (though purple) pages and the last two of the book. I must go get the book. Don’t know that I’ve read it, most likely thumbed through it — so me.

•    •    •

got it. knew where it would be

if I had not tossed it. Some of my bookshelves are for specific types of books — favorites, to read, etc. When I want to put my hand on one means I need it, so I endeavor to know where to find them. Otherwise,

a) I may go on a rampage (or the rabbit hole of the world wide web — don’t think I have ever written that before =), but www seemed to easy a shortcut — to search for the quote or whatever)

b) I could start perusing other books across my path, get scrap paper, and totally go off scribbling and creating, and the original purpose may go out the window or get delayed, which in turn starts a snowball effect. Like when a morning flight is delayed and affects the rest of the schedule for that day


The two re-read pages guided me to two verses, from which I noted: cast off anxiety | be self-controlled | humble | strong, firm, steadfast


haven’t even started

on the dedication snippets from the book that I found a few minutes ago! Why I have a book I gifted? Hmmm, may never be fodder for a blog. Maybe for a novel.

i wrote this on july 31st

Posting today because I am shunning what I want to do. Being reluctant.


re·​luc·​tant | ri-ˈlək-tənt

feeling or showing aversion, hesitation, or unwillingness

btw: “the proof is in the pudding” s/b the “proof of the pudding is in the eating”

random thought